Officiating a friend’s wedding is a meaningful honor, but it can feel daunting to find the right words. Here’s a guide to help you craft a ceremony that’s personal, heartfelt, and memorable.

Opening Words

Start by welcoming everyone and acknowledging the significance of the moment. You might say something like:

“Welcome, everyone. We’re gathered here today to celebrate the love between [Name] and [Name]. It’s an honor to stand before you as they commit their lives to one another, and I’m especially grateful to be here as their friend.”

You can add a touch of warmth by acknowledging the couple’s relationship with those present: “Looking around, I see the faces of the people who have shaped, supported, and loved [Name] and [Name]. Your presence here means the world to them.”

Sharing the Couple’s Story

This is where your friendship shines through. Share a brief story or observation about the couple that illustrates their connection. Keep it genuine and appropriate for all audiences:

“I’ve known [Name] for [time period], and I can honestly say I’ve never seen them happier than when they’re with [Name]. There’s this moment I remember when…”

Focus on qualities that make their relationship special: how they support each other, make each other laugh, or navigate challenges together.

The Meaning of Marriage

Offer some reflection on what marriage represents. This doesn’t need to be lengthy or overly philosophical:

“Marriage is both a joyful celebration and a serious commitment. It’s choosing to build a life together, to be each other’s partner through all that life brings—the adventures and the ordinary moments, the triumphs and the challenges.”

The Vows

Introduce the vows by explaining their importance: “Now [Name] and [Name] will make their promises to each other. These vows are the foundation of the commitment they’re making today.”

If they’re writing their own vows, simply invite each person to share. If you’re providing traditional vows, make sure to practice the phrasing beforehand.

The Ring Exchange

“These rings are a symbol of the promises you’ve just made—circles without end, representing your eternal commitment to one another.”

Guide each person through placing the ring and saying something like: “[Name], I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and commitment.”

The Pronouncement

End with the official declaration and invitation to celebrate:

“By the power vested in me by [state/jurisdiction], I now pronounce you married. You may kiss!”

After the kiss: “It is my joy to introduce to you for the first time, [how they want to be introduced]!”

Tips for Success

Practice your delivery.Read through the ceremony multiple times so you’re comfortable with the flow and pacing.

Keep it concise. Aim for 15-20 minutes total. Guests appreciate a ceremony that’s meaningful without being lengthy.

Be yourself. Your friend asked you to officiate because of your relationship with them. Let your genuine affection and personality come through.

Have a backup plan. Print your ceremony script in a large font and bring a backup copy. Consider what you’ll do if you get emotional (it’s okay to pause and compose yourself).

Check legal requirements. Make sure you’re properly ordained or registered if required in your location, and understand what paperwork needs to be signed.

The most important thing is that your words come from the heart. Your friend chose you for this role because they trust you to help make their day special. Speak with sincerity, celebrate their love, and enjoy being part of this incredible moment in their lives.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Let us know in the comments if this has helped or if you’ve got suggestions we can include

About the Author 

Helen Bach is a relationship expert and writer who helps people find the right words when it matters most. She studied English and English Literature at the University of Michigan, where she developed a passion for how language shapes love, conflict, and connection.

At whattosaywhen.net, Helen writes clear, down-to-earth advice on what to say in real-life situations—from first dates and tough conversations to breakups and makeups. Her goal is simple: to make talking about feelings less awkward and a lot more honest.